Priorities and Tender Mercies

November 1, 2011 already.  Can you believe it?  It's been quite the semester so far.  I've had several great opportunities to grow, and I have made so many new friends.  For the most part life has been treating me pretty well.  My life has consisted of pretty much the following few things: school, PA's, church, work, family, and friends.  Sound pretty normal right?  Well, yeah.  For the most part.  The only problem is how I've been prioritizing them. 

I've been in a funk lately, and I concluded last night the best way to pull myself out is to re-prioritize. 

From top to bottom, I have gone through and decided what needs to come first. 

1.  The Gospel.  I need to focus on being a better disciple of Jesus Christ.  When my spiritual well-being is in order, everything else seems to fall into place.  My scripture study and prayers have been weak lately, and I am going to give them the 100% I need to. 

2.  Family.  I haven't done very well at showing I love them lately.  I am going to start making sure they know. 

3.  School.  Even though, as I type this, I am sitting in Intro to Political Thought, I need to invest some more time in outputting quality school-work.  I've been completely guilty of procrastinating everything to the last minute.  Today I start to be better. 

4.  Presidential Ambassadors.  I don't remember if I ever mentioned it or not, but this year I am the President of the PA's.  It's been such a learning process, and I count my blessings for the opportunity, it's just that because I've been giving so much to the organization, everything else has been waning.  I need to find a better balance, I think it's called delegation... Okay.  I've always stunk at delegating.  But I'm going to get better. 

5.  Friends.  Something that has always been SO important to me.  I just need to take a time-out from being social, and focus on pulling the rest of my life together. 

I know that if I can control myself to follow these priorities, I will get out of my funk sooner than later.

Last night as I sat in the library evaluating this, my roommates Amanda and Shelby came stumbling around the corner.  They had a f'real smoothie in their hands and so graciously bestowed it upon me with the words, "you need brain food."  

Aren't they the sweetest?  What a tender mercy :)

(Yes, I do in fact have black fingernails... I told you I was in a funk.)

Anyhow, I started that post on Tuesday morning, and I'm finishing it now.  You want to know what happened tonight?  I knew you did.  Well, I got a text earlier this afternoon from the ward's executive secretary asking if I could meet with the bishop tonight.  Of course I said yes, despite my fear of loosing my current calling of "ward greeter" (which by the way is THE BEST calling in the history of callings).  I set it up for 7:15.  After PA meeting, and doing task force leader interviews I headed home, ate some mashed potatoes and changed.  I showed up to my appointment two minutes early and the Bishop was waiting for me.  

He invited me into his office and we sat down.  He proceeded to tell me that he just wanted to get to know me a little better.  THANK HEAVENS!  (ward greeter is still in the bag)!   We talked about where I was from, and then got into family.  Of course when family comes up I almost always end up talking about my brother.  I shared with him the readers digest version, and he shared with me a hymn.  "Oh, What Songs of the Heart"  The words are beautiful. 

We moved on to talk about school and my well-being in other areas.  I explained to him my reorganization of priorities and he asked me to share with him.  So I did.  

Words of wisdom given by Bishop Jullian:

1.  Pray and go to the temple.  

2.  Follow even the smallest of promptings.  When you have a fleeting thought of somebody, just pick up the phone and call them.  Just do it, It's amazing how you will be blessed. 

3.  Have a study hour.  A set aside time each day when you just do homework. 

4.  Let ambassadors have their autonomy and agency.  They will take care of themselves and I will develop better leadership skills.   

He then moved onto asking about my future plans, asked about a mission.  I told him the truth, that my whole life I felt as though I would go on a mission, but right now, it's just not feeling right.  He made me feel SO much better about this.  While his response was somewhat generic, it meant a lot.  He told me that there were a million ways to be a missionary, and that I had the opportunity to fulfill them everyday.  He told me to keep the option open though, which I will.  I've got time after all.  

He left me with the counsel to simply pray.  The Lord has placed options in my life, and now I just need help being guided in the right direction.  I left feeling so much of the Savior's love for me.  I have a testimony that he is called of God, and was inspired to call me in.  The Lord knew I needed that.  Again.  What a tender mercy.  

I have every reason in the world to be happy.  So do you.  

Cheers, 

Sydnie Juniper

Crossroads

Last week I logged onto my SUU portal and made use of the new program called Degree Works.  I evaluated my remaining credits for my bachelors degree and found out that after this semester I only need 30 more credits.  30.  That is enough to finish in two more semesters.  One semester earlier than I had anticipated.  Cool, right?  Well, I guess so, but graduating early means making some major decisions that could have quite an impact on my future. 

Lately I've been asked by a lot of people if I plan on going on a mission.  I usually plead the fifth.  That is, because I don't know the answer to that question.  I turn 21 in August, but by that time, I might as well wait four months and finish my undergraduate.  But, I don't want to be one of those sister missionaries that went on a mission because they were done with school, weren't dating anybody, and didn't want to get a real job yet.  I feel like that is a very one-sided decision.  The truth is, I LOVE the Gospel, and I will go on a mission if that's what the Lord's plan is for me. I want it to be something we decide on together.  

Another thing that's been on my mind is graduate school.  I plan on going, I definitely want to get a masters degree.  I was talking to some dude who has two masters degrees the other day, and I asked him what his best advice would be to someone wanting to go to grad school.   He told me to never stop.  It is so much harder to go back to school than it is to keep pushing through.  I believe him, which means if I follow his advice, I should be taking a GRE Prep class next semester.  Then I should start being serious about picking out and applying to graduate schools.  Which scares me.  But, not only that, it might be a good idea to pick out a specific program to apply for... but that's only a minor detail, right? :) 

Or maybe I could just get a real job, and selfishly save all of my money to travel around the world.  

Or maybe I will join Peace Corps. 

Or maybe I could invest all my time in studying random facts and try-out until I get on Jeopardy.

Or maybe I can take up golf and start networking with the rich and famous and just become a celebrity groupie and live vicariously through them. 

Or maybe I will just become a nomad and backpack across the world.

The possibilities are endless really. 

I just need to actually choose one... 

Lovies, 

Sydnie Juniper

What if...

I didn't feel any emotion?
I knew exactly what my future held?
I could make a decision and not second guess myself?
I wasn't afraid of being vulnerable?
I always assumed the best in people?

What if?

It's a vicious game I play with myself.  I hate that I do it.  I'm happy.  I promise I really am.  It's just that sometimes I get sucked in, and it takes a while to work my way out of it. 

I just want to be my best.